Let's Talk Bachelor: Episode 3

Didn't watch it yet? Well, hurry up!

You know you have a snow (ice) day today, and you don't have anything better to do.

Or maybe you're at work like me, in which case, you have my empathy.

Let's face it. This season would be totally boring if it weren't for Michelle. Although, now she's just coming off as more desparate than crazy. I feel sorry for her. She's 30, she has a kid, and she wants a husband in the worst way. The other girls? Let's just say they aren't her biggest fans. A few of them mentioned that they actually avoid her! Too funny.

At the beginning of the episode, I noticed how terrible most of the girls look without makeup on. They get SO done-up for their dates. They must have professional makeup artists & hair stylists on set. They have to.

First one-on-one date

Ashley S.

I've liked her from the beginning when she got the first impression rose. She's the cute nanny with the southern accent. Looks like the girl next door. Clearly, Brad digs it.

Brad takes her to Capitol Records where they recorded, er, attempted to record "Kiss from a Rose" by Seal. They stunk it up, but then got to see Seal sing the real thing. Ashley opens up to Brad about her father passing away and the irony of "Kiss from a Rose" being their special song. Then he gives her the rose during their rooftop dinner because she makes him feel comfortable. Is it just me, or are they ALWAYS on various roofs?

Side note: Girlfriend knows how to dress! Those black leggings & coordinating flowy top looked awesome on her.

The Group Date

Love Hurts

Before the date even begins, Michelle is all emotional because she doesn't want to share Brad with the other girls. Well then why did you come on this show?!

The ladies arrive to the set of an action movie that they'll be filming in matching, sporty attire. They were clearly forced to wear these outfits.

[Photo Credit: ABC]

They warm up and then practice scenes where they beat people up to rescue Brad. Some of them aren't keen on the idea of breaking a sweat & one of the women complains that "pit stains are not hot." Touche.

Shawntel stands out as the best butt-kicker & Brad takes notice. Perhaps this is because she kept going off-script to makeout with him.  Michelle cries to the camera crew some more and then says she wants her first kiss with Brad to be real. And slippery. (Vomit).

After the filming the group goes to yet another pool (probably on a roof) and they all jump in with their clothes on. Then somehow... they're all in bathingsuits. Camera magic. Brad kisses Chantel O. after she talks about her Dad passing away. Michelle acts like a total creeper by sneaking up on Brad & Alli when they have their one-on-one time. Then when she finally gets him alone, she runs a guilt trip on him about how hard it is being a single mom and they make out.

[Photo credit: ABC]

"Pretty soon it'll just be me & Brad in Tahiti, practicing making babies." (Michelle)

Brad ends up giving the rose to Shawntel & Michelle is not pleased.

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Back at the house, Emily brings the girls not on the group date to tears with the story of her fiance dying in a plane crash & finding out she was pregnant shortly after. And of course I cried. Again.

The girls compare Emily to an "Itsy bitsy Barbie doll with the soul of Mother Teresa." Exactly.

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Second one-on-one date

Emily

[Photo credit: ABC]

Brad takes Emily (on a plane, oh the irony!) to wine country and they have a boring afternoon chatting. Brad asks her a lot of personal questions, which she completely avoids. Then they head into a beautifully decorated barn for a romantic, candlelit dinner. Emily finally opens up & shares her story. (Cue me crying for the third, possible fourth time over this story). Brad is very sweet and claims that it makes him like her even more. She doesn't seem to believe this. (Neither do I).

They share a nice, sweet kiss and Brad tells us that he could see himself ending up with her.

Cocktail Party

Before the cocktail party, Brad's therapist pays him a visit and they talk about being vulnerable, open & making the girls feel comfortable.

Brad is extra pumped for this cocktail party and it's pretty uneventful until Madison pops out her fangs and tells Brad she's thinking about leaving. He can tell she's just not feelin' it and is quick to tell her that if she wants to leave, she should. Ouch.

Michelle scores another chat with Brad and starts the convo off by saying "We're in a fight." Umm, is this the 8th grade? She tells him that she's mad that he's kissing other girls and doesn't want him to pursue anyone else. Hello, it's a dating show! Much to my dismay, Brad totally digs it. He's into her psycho, territorial ways. Whatev.

Ashley H. (who had the very first one-on-one date) is a little bummed out and tells Brad that if he doesn't like her, just send her home now. He makes out with her. You know, to reassure her and everything. Totally normal.

Final Rose Ceremony



[Photo credit: ABC]

Brad gives roses to Michelle, Chantel O. and then Madison interrupts and walks off set. Brad follows her and she tells him she's leaving. She says the show is more difficult than she thought it would be, and thinks other girls deserve to find love more than her. It was kinda sad. I felt bad for the girl.

Brad hands out the rest of the roses and sends home Kimberly & Sarah P.

Kimberly is all "I can go home and get a guy in 5 minutes." Well then, why didn't you just do that in the first place? Sarah P. is really upset. Tears. Eye-makeup running. The whole deal.

I hope this season gets more dramatic... I'm kinda getting bored.

Tim was clearly bored the entire time.